How to Network: The BILLIONAIRE Mindset

I am not going to sugarcoat it: for most people, networking SUCKS. Many rank it down there with a root canal, sitting in traffic or the most awkward of first dates – you know, the one where she fell asleep (okay that actually happened to me once). In fact, why do you think there is free food at these networking events? It’s because without free food and cheap booze, no one would go. Well, no one except the business card warriors.

I have heard many reasons for low networking performance. Believe me, all of them are valid. Whether you are shy, afraid of bragging, scared of making a bad first impression, or you just plain hate networking, it’s completely understandable. There are millions just like you so you shouldn’t feel bad about it.

The question is, what do you do about networking? Getting good at “traditional networking” requires overhauling your entire set of social skills. Let’s go with what works for you right now! My definition of networking doesn’t involve doing anything you HATE or dislike doing.

Whenever I hear someone say, “I hate networking,” or “I am no good at networking,” alarm bells instantly go off for me. It says to me that person does not have the right frame of mind to be an effective networker. They probably think there is only one way to network. I want you to know, that networking is not an action. It is a state of mind and the right frame of mind is all you need.

So how do you get into this “magical” mindset? 3 simple steps:

1. Know your goal (a job, a sale, a new connection, a business partner, a simple friendship). Write it down!
2. Always be trying to figure out whether your contacts can help you reach this goal.
3. Understand that it is okay to ask your contacts for favors. Realize that they would, already have, or will ask for something from you. And also realize, that you would be glad to help them if they asked you for a favor. All of the “great networkers” are not afraid to ask their contacts to help them if they needed it.




Obviously, you noticed that I emphasized contacts. Understand that all of your friends, are your contacts, but not all of your contacts have to be your friends. It’s an unwritten rule in networking.

Your contacts are the people that have the position or other contacts that can get you the job, or the sale, or whatever else you need.

To be a great networker, you don’t have to be good at the “traditional networking event.” I mean, you should be, but its certainly not required. In fact, those that master the “networking mindset” can network wherever they want. Yes, the networking event is the quickest place to make a lot of contacts. But it is definitely not the most fun or most effective method for everyone.

All that is required to network is that you be around new people. By doing so, you make new contacts. Why not pick the most fun situation as possible? That way, you are around people with similar interests, you already have something in common to discuss, and you see each other frequently.

If you like reading, join a book club. If you like sports, join a sports team. If you are a student, join a club. Video game junkee? Get on XBox live and chat while you play. Computer nerd? Go to a LAN-party or a Hack-A-Thon. If you like volunteering, there are plenty of options! Try idealist.org

I like a resource called Meetup. There are groups for just about everything on there. And there is something there for you….

To begin your quest, adapt this “magical” state of mind. Then use Linked-in, Facebook, or whatever other tool to analyze your associations and see who you can connect with. And if need be, go out and make new ones, in whatever way works best for YOU.

***Extremely HELPFUL Hint ***

With your contacts, make it a goal to be helpful, and see what you can do for others. This makes them want to reciprocate. People quickly sniff out those who are out networking for their own agendas. If you don’t know a way you can help someone else, try ending a conversation with “I’ll keep my ear to the pavement for sales openings…” There are some additional tips in my creative networking article.




For those that feel they are shy or introverted:

In my preparation to write this article, I talked to a few of my more “shy/introverted” friends and contacts. One of the things that was recurrent was that they didn’t feel the need to be around people. Unfortunately, even though you may find it difficult or uncomfortable, you are going to need to step out of your comfort zone. Look for the pleasure in being around others. Make a goal to do it once to three times a week, even if you have no reason or purpose in doing so. And as you do it, you will condition yourself, and feel much better. Even outside of becoming a better networker, your social life will improve greatly as a result.

For all of you TV addicts… change your thinking and chant after me: “DVR…. DVR…. DVR.” You can watch your shows at 2:00AM on Sunday morning.

Conclusions:My name is Sam Diener. I enjoy bringing you these articles. Please feel free to share with whomever you would like. If you would like to share my work on a webpage, please use an “excerpt” of my work and link here. Click the “article list” button up on the right side if you want more advice! You can enter your email below to subscribe and get new articles as they are released as well. (About 1 a week).

Thank you to Kellie Bowers for her continued dedication in making this the best writing on the internet. As always, any grammatical errors are my fault!

Tagged as: business, entrepreneurship, job search, networking, shyness